Freedom to Agitate

Happy Birthday U.S.A. and blessings and honor to the Black ancestors who birthed you.

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As our nation’s birthday arrives I am forced to focus on it’s development overtime, and it’s history of colonization and appropriation. I am angered by the irony of celebrating freedom in a nation where freedom is elusive. This isn’t speculation. This is just facts.

It’s 2017 and I feel we are no closer to the true freedom marginalized groups seek. Plantation slavery has morphed into the financial slavery of school loans; the prison system; and the world of media and sports entertainment. Major corporations have taken the place of plantation owners, but the one thing thing that remains constant is the people at the top. The group is small, male, and white.

Julia, what about Beyonce and Jay Z, or Oprah? My response, what about them? They have accomplished a lot, amassed a lot, and given back a lot. But please do not be fooled. When the men at the top wake up and say “no more”, then they too can fall victim to bad press and negative headlines. Just ask Dave Chapelle, Martin Lawrence, and dare I say Bill Cosby?

I’m wondering, tomorrow as fireworks blast off across the nation, how many folks will be proud to be an American? Even at my worst, I could find something to cling to as a citizen of this country. But at the moment, I am very very stuck. So much is happening around us, and yes it always has been…but this feels different to me. What about you? Do you feel like you can’t breathe sometimes when you read or watch the news. Another Black man shot; another presidential tweet; another war threat… and now, he wants our personal identification information. Why? A registry? Further policing?

I live in fear, but it fuels me. Sometimes I just want to stay in bed and ignore the world, but most days I want to fight. So, tomorrow I am celebrating the freedom to fight and agitate. I fight for true liberation of minds, hearts, and bodies. One day at a time.

Happy Birthday U.S.A. and blessings and honor to the Black ancestors who birthed you.

Julia

 

Coping…

The trauma of being black and a woman in this country is real, and sometimes I need a break from speaking, thinking, and educating. 

I know we have been quiet, but I can only speak for myself when I say it was necessary. I have been struggling to find the motivation to fight in the face of the constant assault on the character and lives of people of color in this country. Not to mention the emotional roller coaster our current administration has taken us all on.

Sometimes, after a long day at work, all I want to do is cry, or curl up with a good book and take my mind far away. The trauma of being black and a woman in this country is real, and sometimes I need a break from speaking, thinking, and educating. 

Sometimes I just need to revel in the fact that I am beautiful, intelligent, and creative individual. I must reset and recharge on a consistent basis in order to rebound from the micro aggressions I encounter each day. Whether it is because I am a woman, black, an educator, or college educated; there are always a set of assumptions people have of me. These assumptions are a symptom of the normative whiteness this society is built upon.

Intended or unintended, constant attacks on your identity are taxing. I would feel guilty at times for being quiet. I didn’t think I had the right to take time for myself if needed. I realize that, this is the only way I know how to cope for now. I am working on finding other ways to self-care on a regular basis.

As my distant family and fellow members of the resistance, please allow for grace as we continue our journey and share our thoughts with you.

Julia